I suck at this whole blogging thing.

SO... its been a while since I've checked in and caught you all up to speed on my life my faithful followers... aka... i'm venting to myself. nbd.(no.big.deal.)

Here is where I'm at:

I got a new job!!! WONDAFUL. I am now a make up artist at MAC. pumped. Love my life.

other than that school is about the only other thing I do with my life. Lord knows I'm not dating. Somewhat bitter somewhat content. it depends on the day... I have a lot of mixed emotions about it even still... you'd think after two years of being single I'd at least know how to feel about it. Truth is I'm still healing. Its a process. Everyday has proven to be completely different. Some days I'm totally fine with the situation, others I'm still deeply wounded. Questions run through my mind constantly about how, why and what if... some call this baggage... I just think its me being thorough. I'd rather just be single and deal with all this now than dive into a relationship with someone who doesn't mean very much to me and bury all these emotions I still have until I can't feel them as much anymore... then have them hit me out of no where one random day... I'm not exactly sure I could handle that. I feel like that would suck worse than just dealing with temporary loneliness. Regardless, I like where I'm at. I feel like I'm climbing Mt. Everest (i chose Everest because i feel like its the easiest one to spell) and I'm going up little by little but I'm just approaching the very top of it... no way of knowing for sure or not but I feel like if I was going to climb a mountain I would get pretty pissed at that point wanting to just get over the hump already! So I feel like thats where I am. I'm incredibly ansi, anxious, nervous, uncomfortable and tired. I'm just ready to finally see the downhill. I'm ready to see the other side of things. Not to say I've been miserable in this journey, I feel as if I've gotten to know a whole new me. Who knew I was an introvert... or at least i feel like it half the time... who knew that I enjoyed being alone more than I enjoyed being with people news to me. I had no idea!! I love it though. I love knowing that I don't HAVE to have someone there 24/7 to depend on. Its comforting to know that I can be fine alone. However with that comes loneliness... I know i said earlier that I enjoyed being alone but I would be lying completely if I said I didn't miss companionship at all. I think it may be the weather. I was talking to a good friend of mine the other day and he said it always in the fall and winter when loneliness kicks it into high gear... he's so right. I miss having someone to snug up next to to keep warm, or hold hands in his pocket to keep my hand warm/ have our fingers intertwined at the same time. So I don't have that again this year... which is fine. I'd rather be alone and lonely than jump into a relationship with someone who I don't care about... I can't do it. I'll take my time, be selective and hang out in the meantime... I am in no rush, I'm almost 21. Just because my friends are getting married and what not doesn't mean that I have to. I've realized that. I'm young I have plenty of time to play and hang out and meet people. Travel, work and do things for me. I'm excited to see whats on the other side of this mountain... I'm almost over the top of it. PUMPED.

so thats my schpeal. (sp)

I Get Lonely Too

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13LRJR0mE1s

INTERESTINGGGGG

Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.

No wonder.

Shmello

Random thoughts from people our age...

-I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can
think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell
my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves
me.

-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.

-I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to
have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and
sticks when they've invented the lighter?

-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're
going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to
be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the
direction from which you came, you have to first do something like
check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to
yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're
crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

-That's enough, Nickelback.

-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was
younger.

-Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know"
feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose
not to be friends with?

-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't
work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically
fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all
know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards
or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

-There is a great need for sarcasm font.

-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and
suddenly realize I had no idea what the f was going on when I first
saw it.

-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually
becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting
90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's
laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little
bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the
only one who really, really gets it.

-How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than
take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history if you die.

-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to
finish a text.

- A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the
spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

- Was learning cursive really necessary?

- Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to
say".

- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and
hunger.

- Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron
test is absolutely petrifying.

- My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads.
Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired
about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us."
Classy, bro.

- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart",
all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up
to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in'
examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete
idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and
said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

-What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each
other?

- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and
instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I
know how to get out of my neighborhood.

- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the
person died.

- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the
shower first and THEN turn on the water.

-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.

- I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu'
to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an
overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

- Bad decisions make good stories

-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their
profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got
the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if
I do!

- Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every
year?

-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring
would probably just be completely invisible.

-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go
around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly
nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be
a problem....

-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work
when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything
productive for the rest of the day.

-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't
want to have to restart my collection.

-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are
going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I
swear I did not make any changes to.

- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people
watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will
they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't
watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and
leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and
goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone
and run away?

- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not
seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she
hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light
internet stalking.

-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle,
then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising
speed for pedophiles...

- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers,
but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still
not know what time it is.

-It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call.

-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to
with it.

-Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car
keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the
Donkey - but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze
button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time
every time...

-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would
happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and
the link takes me to a video instead of text.

-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they
drive behind obeys the speed limit.

-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

-I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

-The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw
they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words,
someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think
about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people
eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by
myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard
before dinner.

back.AGAIN

well.HEY guys! It's most certainly been a minute since our last little convo! but

schools back in session which means I need a reason to procrastinate... lucky.YOU.

This time around instead of getting into the weird awkward little vent sessions I'll

probably posting a ton of stuff on fashion, sports, hot guys, photography and

whatever the heck else I want because its my.BLOG. I may very well offend you so

might I go ahead and apologize for that... I'm going to blame my sweet background

on my page... it makes me feel hard.CORE.

I'm pumped about blogging round 2 though. I have a feeling I'm going to get a lot

more into it this time around.

get.HYPED.

oneword.FIERCE

i LOVE this song

I don't know you

But I want you

All the more for that

Words fall through me

And always fool me

And I can't react

And games that never amount

To more than they're meant

Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home

We've still got time

Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice

You'll make it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me

And I can't go back

Moods that take me and erase me

And I'm painted black

You have suffered enough

And warred with yourself

It's time that you won

Take this sinking boat and point it home

We've still got time

Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice

You've made it now

Falling slowly sing your melody

I'll sing along

Sooo

So last night was just a little dramatic. I was having a miniature melt down... my apologies! I was sitting in my room all by my lonesome with windows opened enjoying the perfect spring weather. I'm sure you understand. Have a wonderful day!

Moving on...

Is it really bad if you get bored with your own life? Wake up go to class, go to work, come home go to sleep. Wake up go to class, go to work come home go to sleep. I mean it would be natural for anyone to get bored with that right? I guess I've gone through a major change this year. I am so used to my schedule being hectic, busy and unpredictable I never knew what it would be like for the normal person. I have played sports since I was four years old. Baseball specifically was my favorite (still is) I grew up at the ballpark either watching my brother play or I was in the diamond. When i turned 11 i was no longer allowed to play baseball with the boys, so naturally I turned to softball... it wasn't an ideal situation due to the fact that there is nothing better than a guy in baseball pants, but I learned to deal with it. When I got to high school I loved softball more and more everyday but at the time it was still just something fun I loved to do... I never saw myself playing in college. I just wanted to enjoy it while I could and when it came time to graduate it would too be time to hang up the glove and cleats.

To my surprise my senior year rolled around and I had colleges trying to recruit me. WHOA you mean people thought I was good enough to play at the next level? With big scary softball girls that seem like twice my age!? OK! So the school I decided to go to was Northern Kentucky University (NKU) a division II school with an incredible athletic program... unfortunately that was not including the softball team. I went there and loved it! Softball drove me crazy but I loved every minute of being on a team and working towards a common goal. Waking up at 430 every morning was a huge drag and it sucked big time, four hour study tables a week was atrocious, and weights were a joke. We sucked for more than half of the year and the chances of us making it to the conference tournament was slim to none. But something happened, our team had a huge heart to heart right after losing a game against St. Joseph in Indiana and suddenly it all clicked we all started realizing what it would take to start winning. Fun. We were all so pissed at coach all the time we stopped playing for fun, we started playing just to shut her up (never worked) instead of that working she just got more and more pissed at us. I swear on everything she's like the freaking energizer bunny. So we got our act together and won the last half of the season which barely qualified us for the conference tournament. Peoria, Illinois is not the most fun place to be... but when you go as an underdog and every team that is playing there has beat you then you turn around and sweep the whole tournament... its a pretty fun place to be! Thats right. We won. We swept the whole tournament. teams that slaughtered us in the regular season we turned around and plowed over them and in the end we got the trophy. Hands down one of the happiest moments of my life. We won. Against all odds we won. After months and months of coach telling us we are "soft" and everything is "bullshit" we won. she was all smiles that day though. Big Kath (coach) was so proud. which in turn made us incredibly happy.

For my post season meeting with coach she told me how well she thought I did in the season and how much she looked forward to having me back for next season I had to break the news to her... I love softball more than anything in this world. But I need to come home. Call me a baby but I miss my family. Never did I think a decision would bother me so much. In the fall it didn't affect me too much I was doing alright... enjoying the time off for the first time in my life. Winter ran through and I was just praising God I didn't have to wake up for pool work outs at the crack of dawn and in the ice cold walk to class with my hair dripping wet and almost turning green from the chlorine. Even in the beginning of the spring semester I was still doing alright... but now. Now that the trees are blooming and the sun is out. Perfect ball weather... its hit me like a ton of bricks. I hate to be all dramatic and say this but its almost as if I dont know who I am anymore. I've let go of the only thing that would define me. I'm a ball player... thats what I am. Its what I do. What I did do at least... watching the 5:00 news the other night the UK softball team came on showing highlights from their game against Georgia... out of no where tears started streaming down my face. HOLY F am I seriously crying in the sports section of the news?!?! I AM soft! I stalk my old teams facebooks everyday just to see how they are doing... i also keep up with their schedule one the website to see the teams records and who did what in that week.

Do I regret my decision to come home?... I can't answer that. So much has happened this year it has made me being home worth it. I would have been miserable if I was away from my family in this hard time... but do I miss playing more than anything in this world?? yes. Its almost as if a huge piece of me is just gone... and I don't know what I could possibly do to get that back.

I miss the dirt in my hair... and the grass stains on my knees... I miss the strawberries from sliding into second on my hip... I miss the smell of leather on my hand... I miss the sound of the crack of the bat... I miss the easy outs... as well as the uncertainty of if I would be able to get to the ball before it drops... I miss the clutch plays... the clutch hits... double plays... diving catches... out of this world throws... I miss looking up to my teammates and learning something new from them everyday... I miss the way my face sounded smacking against the fence going after a ball (ouch!)... i miss the nail biting rally innings where big hits get you back into the game... I miss how good it felt when my pitcher just K a huge hitter... I miss coaches hour long speeches...(ok maybe I don't miss that) but I do miss everything the game has to offer. ballpark hotdogs... gatorade... water... hanging out in the dug out when my team is up to bat... the long road trips... I miss hanging out with my team... I miss it all.

I don't know who I am without it.

Random Fact Numero Dos

5 % OF AMERICANS NEVER GET MARRIED...

crap.

W.E.S.

Waverly Elizabeth Snyder=love

after the seemingly forever pregnancy took my little niece Waverly is here! and i could not be happier! she's hands down the cutest kid I've ever seen and i honestly don't think I've ever loved anything more than i love her! and she loves me too... we talked about it. i apologized to her for scaring her in the womb. I can see now how i could easily scare her... i just got so excited about hanging out with her i freaked her out easy mistake.

anyway she's FINALLY here and is a day old TODAY she was born 7 lbs and 11 oz to be honest i have no idea how long she was... BUT she was born at 6:59 03/09/10 which makes me really happy that she chose to come out at 6:59 instead of just sitting tight for one more minute. she's absolutely a Snyder!

throughout the entire day i think i took about 500 pictures. i'll post a few of my favorites over the last week. but you'll soon find out that she is a stinking cute kid! I'm so happy that I captured the special moments with everyone that showed how much they love and support my brothers family. Waverly has seemed to bring us all closer--when i say all i mean ALL. even the unthinkable. but i couldnt be happier. here are a few pictures I took!

just minutes after she was born. chandler was introducing her to all of us! we were IMMEDIATELY obsessed

she would not take her eyes off of her daddy

how can you not adore this picture!?

mommy and waverly

grammy and waverly

waverly and papa

finally me and wavey

I love her.

***i do have pictures of kelli's family with waverly but they unfortunately are not on my computer they are on chandler's... i'll try to get those posted on here as soon as i can!

Random Fact

DID YOU KNOW...


The majority of suicides occur on a monday.

I'd love to say I'm surprised but I'm not... mondays suck. Luckily today is a friday and we have less to worry about... it all makes sense though. at the end of the day who wants to get back to work or school after a long full weekend?? apparently a lot of people hate monday so much they prefer to just not deal with them at all...

so sad... but so true.

word of advice- if your monday is going to be that bad... stay in bed.

Caroline

WHOA BABY

As the final days approach of my sister-in-law still being prego i can only hope that waverly elizabeth snyder gets here immediately. i'm brushing up on my baby skill by watching baby story on TLC and tonight the ultimate lesson/treat was having the opportunity along with america to welcome Jim and Pam's baby into this world... Cecily Marie Halpert. I already know she will be a wonderful addition to this world and to The Office cast. Long story short I cannot wait for my niece to get here. she was due today actually but that is becoming painfully obvious that, thats not going to happen. She is more than happy where she is... in momma's tummy. Don't get me wrong. thats fine and all but... the longer she stays in there the longer i have to wait to hang out with her... she should want to come out and hang out with me i got her SO many new shoes and clothes. if i were her i'd want all of them.

Mainly i am just excited to have a new friend. This kid is going to be spoiled rotten and I can't wait another minute. I'm considering going and trying to make kelli start pushing... just to see if it works. I mean it couldn't hurt anything... she's already one day late now. lets speed this thing up. If there is one thing Snyder's are not... its patient so i'm utterly confused as to why she is making me wait. anyway-thats the end of my shpeal long story short... WAVERLY GET HERE NOW PLEASE?? k thanks.

Cancer Sucks

CANCER SUCKS. that is all.

Saints

Dear Saints,
I realize am only a fan due to the fact that well, you made it to the super bowl and because you have never won a super bowl... ever. So this is me telling you good luck and it would be really cool if you would win. See I don't have a problem with the colts or Peyton Manning, but i figured I'd give you guys a shot... please don't let me down. But if you do it will be ok because once spring starts I will have forgotten all about it. Football is just a filler until baseball season starts. So since baseball season has yet to begin... good luck Saints.



Dear Reggie Bush,
Unlike the Saints I have been a fan of you for quite some time. You are dating Kim Kardashian and while we all know my love for the Kardashian family... I consider you part of that family Reggie. Not only that but you have flawless skin, spectacular bone structure, a beautiful color, and your eyes seem to sparkle. You have perfect teeth... and it seems as if you have reached the pinnacle of how a man should look. You my friend... are gorgeous. So to you Reg the best of luck. Lead your team to reign victorious over the Colts. And unlike your team I will not soon forget about you... Oh and please make more appearances on Keeping Up With The Kardashians. K thanks.

Yours Truly,
Caroline

My Twinny

so... this is her, her name is amanda. she's quite cute. oh and she aspires to be just like anne frank...
enough said.

random thought of the day

I'm not really sure but apparently men are attracted to women who can cook... if this is true i am completely and utterly screwed. This is more than unfortunate for me. See the most cooking i enjoy doing is taking the "easy bake" cookies cutting the package open, breaking the pre-cut cookie dough and placing them on the cookie sheet and waiting approximately 12-13 minutes for them to finish baking... i like to think i have mastered the art of timing for these delightful treats but i have been known to accidentally forget they were in there and let them burn. I never said I was perfect.

Furthermore, I would like to point out that at this time i have no one following my blog and as a result this would technically be considered talking to myself... am i ashamed of this I ask myself?... no, no I'm not ashamed. As a matter of fact i find it amusing, pathetic, depressing, and therapeutic all at the same time. With that said... I am off to bed. Good night... me.

Gaga is a freak... but i love her

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrO4YZeyl0I

Well Hello!

Well hello everyone! My name is Caroline and I will be your host on this blog site.

A little about myself:

I am 20 years old

I am a sophomore at UK

I work at Aldo (a shoe store) and I love it.

I would like to begin by admitting this blog is probably going to suck... unfortunately, but it's worth a shot right!? it could possibly be kind of fun at the same time. let me know how I'm doing so far! I'll try to blog once a week... if not once a day. that would be pretty cool. I promise to be completely honest and hopefully entertaining at my attempt to create an interesting blog.

Wish me luck!

Caroline